Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Randomize
