ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
