You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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