But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
