another moral hangover. fuck.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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