She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
