So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
My vagina is very pro this idea
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
