Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
