Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
This is the high leading the old right now
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
