How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
