Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
