garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I need a hoe opinion
go on
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
