I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
