At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
