The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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