Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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