I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
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