Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
