would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
