sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
