I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
