i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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