I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
