i just google imaged poop.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
