I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
you mean i was at the winter classic?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
