Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
