The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
