Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize