Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
