i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
bring money and cleavage
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
