You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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