My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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