I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
smell my finger.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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