Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
