That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
