how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Drake has all the answers
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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