I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
