do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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