Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.

(617): View more from Massachusetts

And why did you do that?

(857): View more from Massachusetts

Tequila

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(254): View more from Texas

just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.

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(410): View more from Maryland

We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.

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(319): View more from Iowa

I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.

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