its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
