Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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