Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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