Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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