You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
