things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize