too bad you live with your parents still
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
