I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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