Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
