We won't sleep together?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
