I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
